Ana, my 20-year old daughter is getting married at the end of August. Somewhere in my head I knew this would happen someday. And, of course I’ve been in the loop on this, but it’s still catching me unawares.
A few days ago she moved out. Again, I knew it was coming, but knowing about something and experiencing it are two different things.
I find a strange mixture of joy and grief in the process.
Recently I flashed back to a scene when I first began dating Stephanie my wife. The three of us, Stephanie, me and Ana, were learning how to be together. Stephanie was driving her white VW Jetta. It was dark outside. I can’t remember where we had been, but we were headed back to Stephanie’s apartment.
As she drove along, I reach across and put my hand on her shoulder. Though I couldn’t have articulated it then, it was the best expression I could come up with to say how lucky I felt to be part of this growing, beautiful family.
Ana must have understood my language because from the back seat a little voice issue this command: “Move back.”
I smiled and put on my arm back at my side. Lately, however, there have been many times when I wished I could have said “Move back,” or more like, “Everyone hold on here a minute.” But no one could have talked me out of marrying Stephanie, so I know I’ll just have brace myself as this rollercoaster screams down the ramp.
Ana and Jake Bradley, in the photo above, have begun their own story. There’s about a thousand things I wish I would have had a chance to say, but I guess if I haven’t said them over the last almost 20 years, then they’ll have to go unsaid. Besides, sometimes words don’t clearly convey what’s in the heart.
I pray that Ana and Jake, make their story a good one, choosing what they know is right in their hearts, despite the cost, at every turn. And I believe they will as the life’s choices unfold before them.
